I lay on the hospital bed, staring into space, wide awake at midnight. Inspite of the painkiller and sedative, sleep eluded me. I was exhausted, longing to get some shuteye. Why was it so tough to fall asleep?
I missed a tiny being, who was at home at this moment. Not very far away BUT it was the first time in 17 months that a little angel did not cuddle up to me at night. The tiny hands that curled around mine, the stubborn demands for one more song, the innumerable goodnight kisses…. I missed all that. Would he miss me too? Would he wonder where his mommy was that night? Would he sleep okay? In my drowsy state, I had not even said a proper goodbye when he was leaving the hospital. Gosh, too many thoughts. I needed to get some sleep!
Of course, he would be fine. Thank God for his awesome dad and his caring grand-parents. Of course, I was going to be fine, too. Thank God for the great doctors and the kind nurses who will ensure that.
I miss you tonight, my baby.
The next morning, bright and sunny, a cheerful little fellow with a wide grin ran into my room screaming, “AMMA!”. 🙂